Equinox CEO Niki Leondakis knows a lot about being a woman in a male dominated industry and shares tips for women feeling insecure with unequal gender dynamics at work.
“Leondakis’s advice? “Don’t let it psyche you out,” she said. “Don’t let the noise that that creates in your head stop you from being an active contributor. Make sure that you continue to engage. Lean into the conversation and assert your point of view.” The key is to look people directly in the eye, she added, and eventually, they will pick up on the fact that you’re someone who deserves their attention.
While there are steps men can and should take to make sure women feel more included in conversations, Leondakis said women can do things to meet men where they are, as well. She likens it to learning a new language in a foreign country — in this case, a male-dominated culture. “Don’t lose who you are, but learn to speak the language,” she said.”
Well here is some good news for women—a New York Post article shouts out women in their 40s and 50s who face both age and sex discrimination when they are at the most capable point in their careers! One of our core values is to be a grown up and there is a reason why…
“The truth is midlife women, with all that experience under their belts, who have ridden the rapids of family life and juggled duty and caring, make the most terrific employees. As one senior woman in financial services told me: “Of course I can handle difficult clients. I’m the mother of 15-year-old twins for heaven’s sake. I can handle anything!”
Thats why we are here to provide opportunities for this group of women— because they’ve earned it.
Anu Agrawal is a fantastic example of the women in our extraordinary talent pool and how The Second Shift is growing by leaps every day. Anu joined us early, way back in 2015, with a stellar background in strategic marketing. She regularly pitched for jobs that fit her skills and experience yet she struggled to find the right project. Undeterred she asked us for advice on how to tailor her pitches to highlight her background in a way that works for a broader range of clients.
Recently Anu landed her first gig working with Philz coffee. What made us so happy about this match was that Philz initially only wanted to work with someone in the Bay Area, however, Anu’s background was perfect and they reconsidered and hired her to work remotely. Ultimately this is a win/win/win for all parties and we are glad Anu was tenacious and patient and our client was open to thinking out-of-the-box for their hiring needs. Here Anu shares her experience and advice with other members who might be frustrated by not getting projects or finding the fit. Congrats Anu!
What initially attracted you to The Second Shift and the consulting life?
Like many of us, I made the decision to leave corporate life to be at home full-time with my kids. As the kids have gotten older, it has been the perfect opportunity to re-enter the workforce. I began consulting a few years ago and it has been a great way of transitioning back to my career.
I was introduced to Second Shift by a friend a couple of years ago. I was very attracted to it as the name said it all. I was looking for a Second Shift. I love how it is a company that caters to the lifestyles many of us want. No justification required.
What has been the biggest challenge you face as a consultant?
Honestly, I really haven’t faced a huge challenge as a consultant. Initially, friends who have start-ups supported me and helped me get back into the game. I was worried that it would be hard, but then soon realized that my traditional marketing background was still relevant and actually strongly appreciated by my clients.
You recently landed your first gig through The Second Shift after pitching for many many jobs… yay! What advice do you have for members getting frustrated by mismatched job results or unsuccessful pitching?
My main advice to your members is to keep on pitching and don’t get discouraged. Pitching is part of the work and you have to trust the process. With every pitch I made, I gained insights into what the marketing need is and how I can position myself to meet this need. Also, as I researched companies I was pitching to, I learned more about what I am interested in. I think another important element in pitching is always having an authentic voice.
Now that you have started this job– what advice do you have for your fellow members about negotiating and then onboarding in a consulting role?
When negotiating, figure out the rate that you believe makes the most sense. Do not under-value yourself just to get a job. In the onboarding process, it is important to make the Statement of Work (SOW) as clear as possible related to payment terms, length of the project, etc.
What has your experience working with The Second Shift been like?
Second Shift has been an amazing company to work with. Anytime I have needed anything, I have gotten the support I needed. Even though it is growing every day, Second Shift treats you like a person and not another resume.
Thank you Anu. We are grateful to have you in our member community and keep up the good work! Please remember that word of mouth is our best vetting process–please spread The Second Shift to your friends, colleagues, alumni networks. Let’s all make work work for us!
Have you listened to Abby Wambach’s commencement address to the 2018 graduates of Barnard College? She focuses on her career and how women are socialized from a young age to be grateful for what they get, no matter how hard they worked for it. That lack of confidence and feeling of obsequious gratitude directly influences our careers and results in unequal pay and opportunities for advancement. We see it all the time–senior-level women with deep expertise who sell themselves short because they are grateful for any opportunity to work. Sound familiar?
“Like all little girls, I was taught to be grateful. I was taught to keep my head down, stay on the path, and get my job done. I was freaking Little Red Riding Hood.
You know the fairy tale: It’s just one iteration of the warning stories girls are told the world over. Little Red Riding Hood heads off through the woods and is given strict instructions: Stay on the path. Don’t talk to anybody. Keep your head down hidden underneath your Handmaid’s Tale cape.
And she does… at first. But then she dares to get a little curious and she ventures off the path. That’s of course when she encounters the Big Bad Wolf and all hell breaks loose. The message is clear: Don’t be curious, don’t make trouble, don’t say too much or BAD THINGS WILL HAPPEN…..
If I could go back and tell my younger self one thing it would be this:“Abby, you were never Little Red Riding Hood; you were always the wolf.”
Love that so much and it just gets better from there. No spoilers here– it’s worth watching the whole speech for yourself. But, here is one more section that aligns perfectly with our Second Shift ethos.
“As you go out into the world: Amplify each others’ voices. Demand seats for women, people of color and all marginalized people at every table where decisions are made. Call out each other’s wins and just like we do on the field: claim the success of one woman, as a collective success for all women.
Joy. Success. Power. These are not pies where a bigger slice for her means a smaller slice for you. These are infinite. In any revolution, the way to make something true starts with believing it is. Let’s claim infinite joy, success, and power—together.
Wolf Pack: Her Victory is your Victory. Celebrate it.”
Check out Gina speaking about the future of an equitable workplace at the #Techonomy Conference. One of the highlights is Gina pointing out that bringing in senior-level women shows younger women in an organization that you value diversity, are taking an active role to bring in female voices, and provides role models to show what a successful career looks like. Watch the full panel here!
Last night Jenny took part in a panel discussion with Well + Good founder Alexia Brue and early childhood expert Dr. Tovah Klein about “crushing” work and motherhood. It was a fascinating discussion about the way women change once they have children and how workplaces can adapt to retain their critical participation. Read the re-cap below or the original story here:
These were the big topics of discussion last night at Well+Good’s latest TALK, our monthly series of deep and super-frank conversations with wellness experts.
A sold-out crowd gathered at The Assemblage to hear Well+Good CEO and co-founder Alexia Brue, early childhood expert Tovah Klein, PhD, and founder of career site Second Shift Jenny Galluzzo talk through some hard questions about the delicate balancing act of being career-driven and being a mom.
It was a can’t-miss conversation—but we can catch you up! Here’s their best advice for living life like a boss, at home and at work.
1. Realize there’s more to your identity than being an employee or a mom
“[Becoming a parent] is a huge identity shift no one can really prepare you for—even if you always wanted to become a mom,” says Dr. Klein, the author of How Toddlers Thrive and director of the Barnard College Center for Toddler Development. “Data says that the more ways you define yourself, the better off you will be That way, if one part of your life isn’t going so well, you still have those other parts of you.”
Remembering that you are more than your job, more than a partner, more than a mom, and more than any of the many labels many define themselves by is a tip parents of kids of all ages can put into practice.
2. Have an honest conversation with your boss about what you need and want
Galluzzo—a former on-air producer for Good Morning America, News 12 The Bronx, and Plum TV—founded Second Shift to give women in high-powered careers that are not traditionally mom-friendly a way to do the things they love at a pace that works for them as a parent. Her advice for climbing the corporate ladder while parenting: Present your dream scenario to your boss and how it benefits the company.
Get real about the reasons why you’re irreplaceable and why keeping you on—even if it means a slightly more flexible schedule—will save them money (hey, hiring and training new people is not cheap) and best serve the team.
3. A closed door is not a clear boundary between working and parenting
Or maybe you think working from home is the way to go. “We all dream that flexibility is the key to our lives, and there is truth to that,” Dr. Klein says. “Having a 9-to-5 job is hard when you have kids. But flexibility is a double-edged sword.” One problem? Many women end up feeling like they are never doing enough. “Women feel they have to do double the work to show they are working hard enough,” Dr. Klein says.
“By the time a child has a sense of self, around 15 months, they have no concept of you closing the door to work. They don’t understand why you don’t want to be with them.” — Tovah Klein, PhD.
Another problem: Children can’t understand why, if you’re home, your attention isn’t all on them. “By the time a child has a sense of self, around 15 months, they have no concept of you closing the door to work. They just see it as rejection, and that’s true for 2-, 5-, and 8-year-olds,” Dr. Klein says. “They don’t understand why you don’t want to be with them.”
Her advice: Make the workspace boundaries clear (and no, a closed door doesn’t count). Galluzzo offers up several ways to do this: “There are so many different types of office shares and spaces now,” she says. Or, do your work at a coffee shop. At least any crying kids there won’t be your own.
4. Think of your household like a business
Of course, not all the responsibilities at home should fall on you, right? “A lot of women take on a lot of responsibility without asking for help,” Dr. Klein says. If you want your partner to help out, speak up—and be clear when you do so.
Galluzzo recommends thinking of your household like a business. Sexy? No. Effective? Totally. “Responsibilities have to be divided and shared. There are deadlines,” she says, when referring to who signs the field trip permissions and who is packing lunches. “It’s helpful to say, ‘Here’s the week. Here’s what you’re doing and here’s what I’m doing.‘”
5. Focus on quality time with your kids, not quantity
Dr. Klein revealed a key piece of knowledge that will make every mom feel better: “With the exception of newborns, children don’t need you all the time. They don’t measure their relationship with you in time.”
Instead of feeling guilty for not being home every day when your son or daughter gets home from school, Dr. Klein says to focus on the time you do have with your kids and make it count. Put your phone away and lavish them with your love. “You can build in the message of ‘I love you and I’m here for you’ without picking them up from school,” she says.
Galluzzo points out that there are big, institutional changes that still need to be made. (A start: nixing 5 p.m. meetings and not judging work performance just on who works the longest hours.) The career-motherhood balancing act is precarious and not always going to be walked perfectly—and that’s okay. But these tips should make it a little bit easier to navigate. And remember, you’re not walking it alone.
We just returned from a quick trip to the West Coast a panel discussion for our Bay Area members and friends. In case you missed the live stream (tried and failed to save the video) we pulled together a few of our favorite takeaways and quotes from the inspiring panel discussion. Our guests included:
Amy Henderson of Tendlab– a consultancy providing advice and workshops for Fortune 500 companies and their parents’ groups.
Dr Alexandra Sacks– a reproductive psychiatrist who says women who have children go through a poorly understood biological evolution called Matrescence.
Vanessa Loder– a mindfulness career coach and founder of the Parents in Tech Alliance– a group of parents in the tech industry advocating for change from within company cultures.
Shadiah Sigala– Co-Founder and Head of People at HoneyBook, a payment and vendor management platform for freelance event consultants.
Vanessa Loder: “How can we standardize parents work experiences– you shouldn’t have to win the boss lottery to have a good work experience. The Parents in Tech Alliance is creating a one-page document for parents to advocate for change internally and come armed with statistics and tools.”
Dr. Sacks: “We understand adolescence and the changes that come for kids and a similar transition happens when you become a mother. It’s a profound change and it makes mothers better workers.”
Amy Henderson: “we live in a nation where 1 in 5 women are back at work after 10 days and even in the tech industry, which is so progressive and has perks and policies set up, but they are not backing up what they offer. A policy is not the same as changing the culture and supporting parents from the inside.”
Shadiah Sigala: “I had to experience motherhood to really get it. When I was pregnant the first time we created a maternity leave policy for the company. Even as a progressive company that prides itself on being values-driven and putting its people first –sometimes it takes going through something to know it first hand and make the changes necessary.”
We were so excited to see so many of our Bay Area members and friends come to the event. Please spread the word about The Second Shift to women who should be in our member community and companies looking for a tool to retain and recruit top female talent.
Shadiah Sigala is the co-founder and Head of People at HoneyBook, a vendor management platform for event professionals. As the founder of a growing business that focuses on freelance professionals and the mother of two small children, Shadiah is especially attuned to the issues facing parents in the workforce. She is hosting our event tomorrow at the HoneyBook office and is a panelist in our #breakingbias conversation.
Shadiah, in your role as Head of People at HoneyBook you have put a lot of effort into creating a particular type of work environment and culture. Can you please tell me what makes working at HoneyBook different, what was the intention behind creating this culture, and how to do maintain that standard?
At HoneyBook, we’ve been deliberate about crafting a values-driven company from the get-go. Whereas most companies wait a few years to think about their culture (putting product and profit ahead), we were intentional about our norms and values from our first year. We are guided by five core values, and we live them out in everything we do. It’s no secret that startups are nothing if not ambiguous. But when you have a set of guiding principles, it makes even the most difficult of situations and decisions a little more navigable. Employees truly respect and enjoy that aspect of our company and it’s made us a very desirable place to work for.
HoneyBook recently did a study about the gender pay gap in the freelance workforce that had fascinating results. People may assume that because freelancing is outside of the corporate pay pricing model and people set their own rates it would more equitable–was that the outcome of the study?
Actually, we found that in the creative freelance economy, women are earning 32% less than men in the same professions. That’s a steeper gap than that found in the corporate sector. Interestingly, a majority of respondents in our study didn’t think there was a gender pay gap. That’s incongruent with the data we uncovered, showcasing even more of a problem in the perception of the gender pay gap. Of those who thought there was a gender pay gap, most said it was due to negotiating power and wage secrecy. This suggests that female creatives have the potential to close the gender pay gap simply by negotiating and charging more for their services, in addition to establishing a dialogue around what they’re making in their respective industries.
As a mother yourself, now out on maternity leave with your second child, do you feel that there is a bias against working parents? Is this something you have experienced personally? How do you combat the motherhood penalty in your own business?
After becoming a mother, I felt compelled to institute a generous paid family leave policy (which extends beyond only parenthood) at HoneyBook. It took me, as a co-founder, to experience parenthood in order to empathize and develop a progressive policy. But I know scores of companies in this “land of plenty” that is Silicon Valley that simply do not care enough to develop a maternity leave program, let alone family leave. At HoneyBook, one of our core values is We Are Family, and we mean that down to our policies 🙂
Thank you Shadiah for taking time away from your new baby to host our event and take part in the panel on #breakingbias. See you in SF tomorrow!
